Inki Pinki Ponki

Why did I choose commerce group instead of Science? Can’t I do something more intellectual and get Oscars Nobel? Can’t I solve equations like google search results in 0.0026 secs? Can’t I live a vastly boring life and write an interesting book out of it? Can’t I use my one hand to scratch my head and the other to pick my nose simultaneously?

Though the answer to these questions is a big, bold, underlined, red font “NO YOU CAN’T MOKKU”, I refuse to accept that. Then what’s the reason?

Rewind back…..
Me: Dei gimme one gems da. Please da!
Madhu (my 2nd std mate): *thinks for a minute staring the wall and abruptly running away*
Sorry, I think we did rewind too much.
Fast forward….
Yes this scene. Here you go.

It was 6.30 PM. I was playing Prince of Persia game in my PC with both my legs on the same chair in which I was sitting.

“*Sigh* This buffalo head fellow is not at all dying! What are you da? a relation of CM thatha?” I vexed out. “This is cheating. The computer is cheating with me.” I was speaking to myself.

My Thatha and Paati were reciting Vishnu sahasranamam.

Vishva-moortir-maha-moortih deepta-moorti ramoortiman” thatha started a line

Paati shouted “adhu aaiduthu na!” (that’s done) “Chatur-moorti chatur-bhahu chatur-vyoohah chatur-gatih”. She corrected thatha.

“Huh?” exclaimed thatha. She repeated the same line 3 times in the tone of tamil-dubbed Vijay tv movie “Odungaaaa….. dinosaur indha pakkam varudhu!”.

My paati used to tell all the happenings in the family in this high-pitched voice three-four times for him to even turn back and realize she’s saying something to him.  After the fourth time she’ll shout “onnum ille! Paduthukungo nu sonnen.” (Nothing! I was just telling you to take rest.). But she can’t resist telling thatha when the next news arrives. What a couple!

My mom was preparing uppuma for dinner and she was unhappy with me for not doing sandhiyavandanam in time. My dad came near me and started staring my screen.

“game pa.. game game… ” I told.

“See how irresponsibly you are sitting in a chair”

“Ok, can you show me how to sit more responsibly then!”

“Let’s be serious. Come on tell me which group you are willing to take?”

“Pure science” I told immediately.

“No. You are taking Commerce in your same school.”

“What? I thought you asked me to choose!”

“No. I just wanted to know your opinion. You are joining Commerce” he concluded

“But dad, I like science. I wanna be a doctor and you know that.”

I scored 97 in science and I had been crazy about biology. I started using CBSE books though I was in state board, just for better pictures knowledge.

“Listen Arun. You are born in a Forward Caste, middle class family. You need to score 99+ % to get a seat in medical. We all know that you are not that great. Agree?”

“Yes!” I said approving.

“So join commerce. You need not study a lot. Marks are not important.”

My dreams felt shattered. No more pictures? I thought. Henceforth, only “T “tables? I thought again,

But…………. I liked that dealing 😉

Our school is a thatha to Orthodox schools. Our uniform is dhoti and white shirt for boys and pavadai dhavani for girls (cute, it was! the latter, of course).

I moved to this kollu thatha of a school since I had problems with my 5th class social-science teacher.  I was dumb enough for not knowing that she was not teaching from 6th grade. I cried for a school change and landed up in this matam.

Now my thatha school does not have a pure science group. Reason, they are against having a biological lab in a temple. So I cannot continue in the same school if I wanted to take science.

Basic attributes of a commerce student:

  1. He deals with pretty simple things like income, expense, wealth and debt but uses intricate terms (Debit, Credit, Appeat, Repeat, constitution, constipation) to sound intellectual.
  2. We don’t have future plans to stand a queue in New Jersey istore and buy whatever costly shit they sell on the first day (No I’m not jealous here. Mother promise!)
  3. We support God over science! -You know how humans are evolved from monkey – Adhu dhanda aatha arul!
  4. He is the one who lives real life when science group Abdul Kalams are trying to interpret it in formulas and equations.
  5. He has one word answers to all the problems in the world.
    God! Power cut again – Deficit
    OMG my underwear is missing from the balcony rope– Recession
    I am getting old – Depreciation
    I am getting married – Additional depreciation @ 20%

So I chose the path of commerce (though I frankly was not given any choices). There begins the awesome story of Appatucker!

Arun Ram (Non-B.E) – It’s a qualification now!


7 thoughts on “Inki Pinki Ponki

  1. Machaa.. Kallakitta.. 🙂 I end up laughing out so loud whenever I read your posts, that my mom warns “dei..paathu pallu sulikika pordhu”.. Ulti point is..
    Sci guy saying – “U know man evolved from monkeys”
    Commerce guy – “adhu dhaan da aatha arul!”

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